Home Base

I’ve always likened myself an adventurer. I have the luxury of a job that affords me bi-weekly travel to any continental destination of my whimsical desire. This month: Toronto and Puerto Vallarta. I hop onto planes happily and frequently. Meeting new people, drinking exotic cocktails, becoming momentarily immersed into the language, cuisine and dance of foreign cities – I crave these things with constant pangs. Home for me is a comfortable resting place between voyages; a base for take off and landing.

Despite my ping-pong travel schedule, I can count on just one hand the number of times I’ve altered the latitudinal coordinates of my home base; each time never more than a long car ride away from a loved one. Yesterday, however, my sweetheart and I discussed the remote possibility of being whisked away to the land of the kiwis for the job of a lifetime. Still a direct plane flight to my parents’ peaceful California abode, but far, far away from the status quo I have built on the Atlantic Coast. With jittery nerves and a brave face I tell my love that I will follow him to the moon, because I will.

I wonder then what happens to the pangs of cultural curiosity when the adventure becomes the reality?

Art of War

My mother’s most earnest gift of wisdom she bestowed on me the eve before my wedding as we snuggled, gossiped and relieved the pent up stress of entertaining familial masses was “learn how to fight well.” This was interesting because my sweetheart and I had not yet battled over anything more intense than how many place settings are reasonable to request on our registry (what weighs stronger: the capacity of existing cabinets or a lifetime of slippery-fingered offspring?).

Her point was reiterated this evening during a lively seafood supper with my mother-in-law. She imparted the wisdom her own mother had given to her about the subtle art of cacophonous dispute and was shocked to learn that, even during our extensive travels half-way around the world, my husband and I had not argued.

This is not to say I hibernate naively behind those rosy-hued glasses through which I prefer to view my blessed life. An environment awash with hormones, differing opinions and extenuating circumstances will at some point spark the heated quarrel that we have, up to this point, so blissfully eclipsed thanks to that potent extinguisher called compromise. No matter how inconsequential the debate we listen actively, we persuade patiently, we speak at room temperature, we back-down graciously, and we always, always touch – during and after.

Thankfully, for my mother’s peace of mind, I’ve always been an exemplary student.

Gifts That Keep On Giving

There is an aura of permanence surrounding a bridal registry; gifts that are meant to survive the tides of a couple’s life together. 12 sets of dinner plates to accommodate for clumsy, unborn toddlers; 12 sets of linen placemats and pewter napkin rings to serve a slew of in-laws a gluttonous Thanksgiving dinner at the couple’s yet-constructed, yet-purchased residence; 6 sets of pillow protectors for the pillows that will send a gaggle of future house guests into restful slumber... The bride is carried across the threshold of her blissful, marital abode and is followed with such an abundance of lasting tokens of the generosity of friends and family that no closet, pantry, desk or cabinet drawer will click completely shut.

The comedy, of course, arises when the bride discovers each memento spurs within her a deep thoughtfulness for the person who sent the gift. She pours a cup of oolong and thinks of her mother’s adoring smile. She dishes a serving of Indonesian beef stew from her slow cooker [aside: she did not prepare this beef stew she is serving and thanks the stars her husband actually enjoys the art of food preparation] and applauds her grandparents for blessing her with a savour for the exotic. She sips Bordeaux from an ornate wine glass and toasts Webcowgirl. She cuddles into her cocoa/vanilla-coloured, thousand thread-count bed sheets, against warm skin, and winks virtually to her California girlfriends. She perches on the ceramic throne in preparation for a 'dainty tinkle' and laughs audibly when the baroque toilet plunger conjures images of her high school BFF...

As such, with unavoidable cliché, the bride humbly concurs with the simplicity and truth of the phrase “it is not the gift but the thought that counts."

Something Borrowed

Nobody in the world can prepare you for what happens to your insides when your childhood minister holds his hand firmly over the fingers you have entwined between the fingers of your sweetheart and states with a smile “by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.” I shivered like an electrified caramel flan, sniffed back a blundering leak from my right nostril, squeaked out an involuntary laugh of elation and smiled so wide that my eyes disappeared. I blinked back the salty mist forming behind my eyelids and basked in the warm breeze that was the love emanating from my husband’s gentle kiss, until my breath returned.



It has been exactly one month since that perfect moment and I have yet to return from the ambrosial cloud on which I landed. I can’t think straight. I have been blessed beyond repair. I have been given Eden.

A dear friend inquired the other day as to what I could possibly write about now that I’m sporting two sparkling bands on my left hand and have vowed my forever to a single man. “You’re married and kind of done; it's the whole happy ever after thing.” Exactly. My life as it is worth documenting has only just begun…

Blogs and Distance Running

Question: What do blog happy hours in DC and Half-Marathon events in Chicago have in common? Exactly. Nothing. So ask me again why I decided it was rational to attempt to do both in the same weekend? I have never felt more physically miserable than I did coming around the bend of the 13th mile, hamstrings buckling, awash with self-generated brine, than I did yesterday on the heated pavement of those glorious Hyde Park streets.

Rather than blaming my own lack of preparation (the truth is less comical), I have decided to blame my new friend INPY. Four shots into the night he cackled mischievously, "You aren't getting on that plane to Chicago tomorrow...mwaa haa haaaaaaaa."



That being said, in my effort to remain more elusive and poetic than my DC Cookie alter ego, my recap is simply this: Thank you. I was surprised how absolutely decadent it was to see everybody again, and to be flirted with so egregiously before my impending marriage. You all made me feel like the Queen I most certainly am not. My gratitude is immeasurable and my spirit humbled.

And I'm sorry to have missed Barbara, the most gracious and inspiring blogger in our community of verbal artists - thank you again for your thoughtfulness - I adorned my hair with the ribbon from your gift for the remainder of the evening.

I would say "see you next month" but in lieu of attending an October happy hour, I will instead be lying on a chaise lounge on a powdery Indian Ocean beach, beside my new husband, with a dexterous Seychellois resort employee kneading out the tension from my still-aching hamstrings...

Kickin' It Old School - Happy Hour

I hear the one on the bottom left enjoys a nice vodka tonic, or 8. Last chance to flirt with her before she's a married woman...

Brought to you by: The artist formerly known as Cookie, Arjewtino, I Now Pronounce You, KassyK, Virgle Kent and Just Going With It.

Es Muss Sein - The Karma of September 29th

After painstaking review of my schedule over the next year, I chose my fast approaching wedding date for the simple fact that it wasn’t near any birthdays, holidays or notorious months of bad weather. It was either this fall or next summer and given the speed at which my sweetheart and I have fused into a single entity, it didn’t make much sense to prolong the legal record of our happiness. The availability of a breathtaking reception venue in the canyons of Southern California, and my childhood minister (willing and able to travel 3,000 miles to marry me) sealed my choice. September 29th, 2007. Something about that date felt auspicious.

Months following the booking did I realize the karma behind my anniversary. On the evening of my wedding it will have been exactly one year to the day that I spent 12 charmed “es wird sein” hours falling in love with the man I’m marrying. September 29th of last year I was in Las Vegas for a business trip. I had decided to spend an extra night in Sin City to be entertained, as was tradition between us, by an old friend. He met me at the Venetian casino while I whittled away a few fifties drinking Grey Goose at a black jack table and then whisked me through lesser known local watering holes and tapas bars off the strip. His smile made me weak. A few hours before my morning flight, he slipped his arm under the curve of my neck, curled up not-so-platonically against my lower back, and massaged my shoulders with his fingertips until I fell asleep. We didn’t kiss that night, but we had before and I knew it was only a matter of days before we would again; he had been offered a job in DC. That chemical connection we’d always downplayed to our friends was no longer constrained by coastal distance or significant others. This was it…

So not only will our wedding date memorialize our vows, it will also be a celebration of the exact hour of our unity as soul mates, one year earlier. I liken the rarity of that coincidence to the purity of our affection, and I look forward to embodying the proof that marital odds can be beaten.